So... this summer has been really interesting. It's been so weird to be away from home and yet still feel closer to most people from home than I have in a long time. I think that absense really can make the heart grow fonder. I don't know though... maybe it's the changes I'm experiencing this summer that make me feel so much closer to everyone.

This job is crazy... I love it and I hate it. I hate it because I don't sleep, I don't shower very often, and I feel like I look like a boy. I deal with kids barely half my age and kids who are 2 years younger than me that act half my age. I hate it because it's hard, it's stressful, it's boring when I'm in the office by myself with no one to keep me company, and I hate it when Jenn and I have different ideas of how to relax or of what is really important for the day, but we only have 1 van that is supposed to give each of us what we need...

I love it because of all those things, too. I love the alone time in the office... even if I am "bored" because it allows me to keep in touch with my other staffers and people back home. I love our campers- adults and kids- because they bring so much joy and energy to my life. Even the bad ones end up being a good source of laughter. Like we're still joking about a guy from week one. Very fun.

And I love it because it's an honor. It's an honor to bring this program to these campers. To help them to forgive, to love, to find peace. No... not me... I don't help them do it. These words, the scripture, the message... they all do it... and I just speak it for them to hear it.

It's an honor to work with Jenn and the 12 wonderful volunteers we've had so far (and I'm sure next week's will be no less wonderful!) and the many amazing campers whose love for Christ and for each other and their residents just astounds me.

It's an honor to be chosen to serve... to be given the responsibility to run such an important camp... to be selected from hundreds by people I've never met to come and do this... They trust us with peoples' spiritual lives here...

Why?

That will always confuse me. I just won't get it. Ever. Because their spiritual journeys are too important to just hand over to a bunch of college students.

Unless you give these college students an amazing program.

Which GROUP did.

And now so many lives are changed... and they may not see it now, but they will.

My life is changed. I'm so at peace with everything. And while I'm excited to plan this amazing wedding and have all the details be perfect, I really don't think I'm going to be a Bridezilla... I think right now that this summer has helped me to fall deeper in love with Jeff, and I am looking forward to the marriage, not just the wedding.

I'm learning so much from this job. I'm learning to be a better leader, learning to be more responsible, learning to work with other people and often sacrifice what I want or what I think I need to be considerate of other people. And I'm definitely learning about money management... and I think I'm doing OK! My credit card bills have been so low... I actually SAVED money this summer.

It's going to be so amazing to take all this home and use it at home and in Shippensburg.

Speaking of home... I'm so excited to be there. House shopping (yes, for a house, that we will turn into a home!), honeymoon planning (there goes my salary for the summer!), and other planning details... GREAT. Planning a future with the man I love... my first TRUE love... the one who helped me forgive and forget the ones who hurt me before... the one who made me realize what love was, and through his love helped me grow closer to Christ... this sounds so amazing.

I can't wait until it's me and him... together... a team, forever. I love him so much... and I'm excited to change my last name and make those sacrifices (ok, we can watch basketball now and skip the 90% off sale at the mall) because... well... of love. And Doug Fields would be so pleased to hear about this love and such. But seriously... I'm at peace with all of this. These sacrifices... these conflicts and these grudges that I used to hold on to... They're gone. And peace really has come in to rule my life for the first time.

Someone pass me a lifesaver because this peace is SWEET.

This semester is going pretty well. I'm enjoying the classes better than last semester. And I got placed in Kieffer next year for my RA position, which I wasn't really excited about at first but am thrilled about now.
YAY!

And, the Colts won the SuperBowl... so I am extra thrilled.

ok, that's it for now.